Wow, no kidding, it actually was. I know I got married and didn't have the internet for much of that time (I finally had to shed the cheap internet-stealing ways of my college age years, that lasted waaay too long and purchase the internet for myself), but still my lengthy absence has been inexcusable.
(head bowed in shame)
The good news is I have resurfaced with impeccable timing. Trade season!
I love a good trade, Lord knows I do, but I must admit, when Britton and I posed the latest poll (see: which owner is most likely to make a trade) I was skeptical that there would even be a deal. We all know the stories of Kevin trying to deal
That is, until glorious Thursday came to us, and it brought four friends (deals) with it. Britton has already done a wonderful job breaking down all of the deals, so I'll spend a little less time on it, but let's talk some turkey anyway.
Kevin and Cory:
It came as no surprise that when Kevin couldn't find anyone else to screw this season, he turned to the one man he is already...The only real significant piece changing hands for the current season is Tennessee's defense. DeSean Jackson hasn't done anything noteworthy since Kevin Curtis and Reggie Brown came back, though he is still technically starting. Earnest Graham is on the verge of being tied up in a three-way (I realize the implications that thought brings in a paragraph about Kevin and Cory, but I'm leaving it in) and is losing value by the day. Jacksonville is ok and Selvin Young and Leon Washington shouldn't be starting on anyone's team. Well, maybe Cory's, Don's or Root's.
Jerad and Don:
What is a guy who is undefeated, doing, moving anyone at all? It goes against everything fantasy football stands for. It angers the GodI say no. I'm not opposed to trading keepers for non-keepers if it helps make you stronger for a title-run. Jerad is 10-0, and I'm not sure he needed to take this risk. Doug is charging at him though, and he felt the ground rumbling.
Dan and B&B:
Regardless of Kevin's bulletin board gripes, it has been a well known fact from just about the time Dan made Favre his second overall pick, until Thursday night, that he was shopping Brett to anyone and everyone, with the asking price steadily dropping. This trade does not effect Dan's short term, or long term plans unless Fargas either goes nuts for a few weeks, or is traded in the off-season.Favre becomes what Fargas was for the Leg; a back-up who will occasionally see the field.
/obviously will be taking over the full-time starting gig should his new team reach the playoffs seeing as his Week 14, 15 and 16 opponents are SF, BUF, and SEA.
(giggle)
Doug and B&B:
This was the granddaddy of all deals. A whopper of a deal, in which both teams sensed a change was needed, took a risk, and leaped off a 50-foot cliff hoping to plunge into the ocean below, while avoiding jagged rocks inconveniently positioned all around their landing point.Britton is right; LT doesn't get traded. EVER. Only, he has now been dealt twice in this league's two and a half year history. The first time by Ryan, but we won't get into that.
(If Root is currently squeezing the life out of his mouse, and biting into it like it's a double-double I wouldn't be the least bit surprised.)
LT hasn't played poorly this year, but he hasn't lived up to his usual lofty expectations either, though he has been slowed by a turf-toe. He claims he is now healthy, and Doug is banking on it. I wouldn't be surprised if LT scores 10-12 TDs over the remaining six fantasy weeks, and I wouldn't be surprised if he scores three.
Gates/ Witten both have very little long-term implications for either team, but take a bite out of crime, and hear me when I say this: Antonio Gates is better than Jason Witten despite preseason expectations that claimed other wise. The reason is simple. Witten likely won't play another game this season healthy. Like LT, Gates is finally over the hump injury wise, and performing very well.
Reggie Bush. When do you trade LT? When Reggie Bush is available. If Bush can stay on the field, he will be a huge part of STL!!!'s future. If not, a day shall not pass where Britton doesn't remind me of the time I stared straight into the USC sun and was blinded enough to deal the best player who has ever played for a fantasy team of mine in any sport.
While we are here, my head is still spinning regarding Kevin's assertion that Bush, Chris Johnson and Darren McFadden will all still be in this league 13 years from now. When I read that post Mountain Dew nearly squirted out my nose from laughter.
What a guy, that Kevin.
Ok, so I lied. I was altogether anticipating breaking down each deal in depth, and yet I told you my analysis would be shorter than Britton's.
I haven't blogged in over a month. Leave me alone.
I'm renaming the tiers so as to spice things up a bit. Try to keep up...
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The 'You're Five Foot Nothin' Tier
(For teams that play like they are the size of Sean Astin)
12) Longies
Don, you stink man. Flat out stink. You may not be in 12th place in the standings, but you are here. Kudos in upgrading your QB situation though.
PS: I can't believe two things. That Matt Cassel scored 42!!! points this week, and that he is currently the most productive USC bred quarterback this season.
(In fairness to the integrity of MVPs and LVPs, I'm going to remove anyone who played on Thursday from eligibility for an award.)
MVP- Dallas Clark. Call it a hunch. It helps he's playing against Houston, Marvin Harrison is terrible, and Reggie Wayne is banged up.
LVP- Roy Williams will benefit from Romo's return to the lineup, just not this week.
Doghouse Dandy- Carson Palmer cemented his Dandy status with the Eli trade.
11) Bye Bye Brady
Cory has three wins. Cory has 45 points thus far this week. Cory somehow finds himself with a 11 next to his name and in the worst tier possible. I see Cory's 45 points, and raise him with an "I still expect him to lose to a 1-9 team."
MVP- This is difficult since Ritz has already had three guys play, but I'll go with Ronnie Brown here.
LVP- Marvin, Marvin, MARVIN.
Doghouse Dandy- Earnest Graham, who after scoring 20.5 points the last three weeks found himself on a train to
10) Bayside Tigers
I wanted to put you higher Matt. I really did. But when the rubber hit the road, I just couldn't quite squeak you out of the bottom tier. Beat Cory like I believe you can, and then let's talk.
MVP- Steve Slaton, though I feel like I should add here, I fully expect 'The Breast' to go off on Seattle's hapless defense.
LVP- Aaron Rodgers is going to get crushed this week. I feel it in my bones.
Doghouse Dandy- Tory Holt. It's a good thing Chad Johnson sucks too.
The 'Co-stanza! It'll Get In Your Head!' Tier
(For teams that you don't quite like but can't quite get out of your head)
9) First Down Syndrome
Dan dealt Favre, and though it was a decent trade for him, it signified the end of his season. For Dan to rise in the ranks, Braylon and Chad need to first learn how to catch again.
MVP- Adrian Peterson. Like it could be anyone else.
LVP- Jeremy Shockey doesn't like Drew Brees too much these days.
Doghouse Dandy- The entire league for not giving him anything better for Brett Favre. But seriously, flip a coin between Chad, Braylon and Mendenhall. It's one of those guys.
8) CedricBenson4Pres.
Trust me, I'm as surprised as you are. But for the first time in a while, Root has managed to hold onto a few keepers (six to be exact) that I don't exactly totally hate. I'm going to go out on a limb here (a really high, thin one) and say that with a good draft next year, Ryan might not be so bad.
MVP- Tim Hightower is going to feast on Seattle, and Marshawn Lynch is going to eat Cleveland alive. I'm going with Hightower strictly based on the 'When any moderately big time player plays Seattle...' rule I created earlier in the season.
LVP- Matt Jones. Frick man, PLEASE stop playing him!
Doghouse Dandy- Joseph Addai. Seriously, who would have thought that in the pre-season trade that netted Root, Addai and DeAngelo Williams, DAW would have been by far the best player he got in the deal? Freaking impossible. I still can't believe it.
7) Big Balls
You want to count Reid out. You really do. Each time you think about it though, he takes a chop into another teams' playoff-dreaming-tree trunk. Reid won't go away. I think he makes the playoffs when it's all said and done.
MVP- KURT WARNER. I can't state that strongly enough.
LVP- Bernard Berrian just isn't any good. Yes I know he has 98 fantasy points. I still think he stinks.
Doghouse Dandy- I don't know. I don't really have an answer here. Everyone is doing what a reasonable person would more or less expect them to do. Maybe this is why I think Reid makes the playoffs. He's pretty solid, though not great, everywhere.
The 'I'm Gonna Go All-In Because I Don't Think You Have The Spades' Tier
(For teams that probably don't have what they want you to think they have)
6) Cobra Kai Says
As we sit here, Kevin is a playoff team. If he win's out, he's in. He's watching
PS: I'm still cracking up over the '13 years' remark. Classic Kevin.
MVP- Peyton Manning. Do I feel comfortable naming a guy who had the most garbage 3-TD performance of all-time last week, an MVP this week? Not really, no. But Peyton playing Houston makes me feel better about it.
LVP- Brandon Jacobs, because the Ravens are determined to stop the run this week, although I'll shoot straight with you; I can see Jacobs rocking a 53 yards with two TDs performance just as easily as I can a 53 yards with nothing else.
Doghouse Dandy- Julius Jones is REALLY good!
(hahahaha)
5) SWEEP THE LEG!!!
This rank has Britton and I in the playoffs, but I'm not so convinced we will still be there in three weeks. Reggie Bush desperately needs to get back on the field next week for that to happen, and that is no sure thing.
MVP- Since I can't name Favre, I'll pick Santana Moss against a shaky Cowboy's secondary.
LVP- Chris Johnson is a G, but I think he will be slowed for a second straight week.
Doghouse Dandy- Right now it's newly acquired Reggie Bush since he won't be seeing the field this week.
4) Karen Franke
This Steven Jackson thing is obviously more serious than people originally thought. Without him in the lineup, Nick starts only three guys who have scored above 100 points on the season. That is hardly what I call elite.
MVP- ANQUAN BOLDIN. (see; Really Sucks, Seattle)
LVP- Willie Parker will split carries, and not have much to show for the ones he gets at the end of the day.
Doghouse Dandy- Big Ben and LJ. Both need to start playing better, or Nick will exit stage left in the opening round of the playoffs.
The 'I'm Your Huckleberry' Tier
(For teams that are good enough to be No. 1)
3) America's Team VII
David is good. Really good. But I just can't shake the feeling that he is headed for a let down in the playoffs. I see him losing in the second round. If his big shots stay hot though, both teams ranked ahead of him had better look out.
MVP- I'll take Drew Brees for 500, Alex. (He might throw for that many yards against the Chiefs.)
LVP- Well the guy I easily would have picked has already played. So... Tampa Bay I guess??? I think David has a good week, so it's hard to believe another one of his guys let's him down.
Doghouse Dandy- Kellen Winslow, though if Quinn keeps tossing him the rock he won't be there for long.
2) Evil Petting Zoo
As I mentioned in the trade recap I think LT and Gates will only make this crazy talented team stronger. I'm having a hard time believing anyone other than Doug is walking away this year as the champion of our league. No disrespect to Jerad, our resident undefeated team, but I think Doug beats him this week, and continues to march towards the title thereafter.
MVP- Larry Fitzgerald. If I have to remind anyone the Cards are playing Seattle at the point, you deserve to be punched in the kidney.
LVP- Doug is going to score 160 this week and won't have an LVP. Unprecedented, but it's going to happen.
Doghouse Dandy- I have to believe Doug was just flat out tired of wondering how many weeks, and which weeks, Reggie Bush was actually going to suit up. Enough was enough.
The 'You... Beat Me... At Golf?!?!?' Tier
(For overconfident ninnies who are about to lose to Doug)
1) daytwodaddy
Jerad, I'm not disrespecting you. I'm giving you your due. You haven't lost, and until you do, you will remain the team to beat. I just happen to think you are about to run into the pain train!
If Doug doesn't beat you now, he still might in the playoffs. He has a really good team.
Has there ever been a 10-0 underdog before? I think you are the first, but that's the beauty of it. No one expects you to win, so you can use the 'us against the world' mentality.
MVP- Terrell Owens. If anyone will take advantage of the Romo over Brad Johnson upgrade, it's going to be T.O.
LVP- Willis McGahee won't be horrible, and he might score a TD, but I still expect him to end up in the 8-11 point range.
Doghouse Dandy- What did Eli Manning ever do to you to deserve getting dealt for Kyle Freaking Orton? You need to send him an E-Card saying your sorry for the way you treated him.
That's it for this week. As always, get on the comment board and let me know how full of it I am.
Posts
3 comments:
Ben. I know you have been out for awhile. but you dissapointed me with your leon washington comment. Not starting??? he is the # 6 scoring rb in all of the league this year. And has scored more points then Bush, Barber, MJD, C Johnson, Jacobs, Brown, LT, Westbrook, Lynch, Jackson, Lewis, Slayton and Turner just to name a few. Got to give respect to return yards my friend. They are the disrespected high scoring category
comment number two. i think baysides power rankings should also be posted on tmofnfl as well. they just seem the best to me. and most accurate! keep up the good work baside
If I wasn't totally sure that you wouldn't be asking that if you hadn't scored so much this season, I'd think about adding those rankings.
The main reason I wouldn't is answered in this thought: if my aunt had a package, she'd be my uncle.
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